not in the mood

Assalamualaikum..

For the last 2 weeks, I mean since class have been started, I feels like im not in da mood..yeahh im really not in the mood..

To be true, I really cant show my bad mood..I must always smile..yeahh smile even its difficult...

did they know about what I feel right now?maybe they dont realize that im hurt..yeahh really hurt to have this feeling..
But I cant show it to them..I must act that im a tough girl..

to be true, everyday im feel like im going to cry..but I cant..I cannot cry in front of them..but i cry after praying..I cannot avoid it..

so I just want to say that im not really in the mood..this afternoon somebody ask me 'dont u feel sad?' N i answer that question 'its a lie if I said im not feeling sad..of course im sad..really sad u know'..